The cure for cancer

There’s a cure for everything. And I’m gonna tell you how to cure cancer too….

But first, I’m gonna tell you how to cure everything else.

Osteoperosis – Taking more calcium won’t help. And most osteo-meds actually cause more fractures in the long run! Calcium doesn’t even function unless you are getting enough vitamins to activate it and make sure it gets to where it needs to go. You need lots of vitamin K for that! The best kind comes from grass fed beef liver. It’s also found in cod liver and butter from grass fed cows. High protein diets rich in these animal products provides higher calcium absorption in the intestines, and the vitamin K is absolutely vital to it’s function. High protein diets have been found to reverse bone loss and tooth decay. Delicious!

Obesity – Eat Paleo. Don’t eat more than 3 meals per day. Don’t eat too much. Read this website. Obesity is is caused by overeating, inflammation, chronic stress, excessive food reward, and lack of movement, and all that stuff compounding to increase fat storage. Paleo fixes all that. Durrr.

Heart Disease – Taking statins and other cholesterol lowering drugs won’t help you, and they will actually hurt you in many ways. Cholesterol is good for you. What you need to avoid is inflammatory foods like high amounts of polyunsaturated fats, processed foods, anything hydrogenated, and sugar. Easy!

Diabetes – Both type 1 and type 2 diabetes have been successfully treated with low carbohydrate ketogenic diets. You can eventually get off the meds and not have to worry about losing limbs! Cool! Even better, you can prevent diabetes in the first place by avoiding highly processed foods, sugar, and tons of grains! Friggin easy!

Lyme Disease – Lyme disease is perpetuated by a weak immune system. The Paleo diet makes your immune system as strong as it can be, so that the lyme disease treatments actually work more effectively. Check out this success story!

Aids – Still workin’ on that one…(I asked Magic, he hasn’t gotten back to me yet)

Pink eye – Just wash your hands sometimes you filthy animal! Ok ok back to serious now.

Skin Problems – Eliminate wheat, industrial veggie oils, sugar, legumes, and dairy if you like. Most skin issues are inflammation related. Eliminate systemmic inflammation by avoiding those foods with antinutrients and damaging properties, and see what happens. I fixed eczema, acne, dandruff, and overall dry skin with Paleo. You can too.

Weakness – Lift weights. No, seriously. Lift some fucking heavy weights. Don’t be lazy.

Arthritis – It’s now universally recognized as an inflammatory problem. Again, eliminating systemmic inflammation by avoiding food toxins, i.e. following a Paleo diet, will fix all that easy smeasy. Just do a search on my blog for “inflammation”, you’ll see.

Here’s the one you want. The one you all came to read. The cure for cancer? Here it is!

Cancer – While the results are mixed on the actual efficacy of modern cancer treatments to increase survival rates, they certainly cost a ton of $$$, and they might make you live like, a year longer. I dunno, is one more year of life worth putting your entire family in debt, just to delay the inevitable? If you’re gonna die from cancer, the ugly statistical truth is, you’re prolly gonna die from cancer. Hard to fathom, huh? Ok I know this is a bit harsh, but actually there’s lots of evidence to support low, or zero-carb diets during treatment. Since cancer cells reproduce on excess glucose, it’s in your best interest to keep dietary sugar low or non-existent. Fasting has also been shown to improve the efficacy of chemotherapy. If you want to prevent cancer, don’t smoke, don’t slather your skin in photo-reactive chemicals (sunscreen, products galore, moistureizers, blah), don’t eat a ton of processed crapoid-food-like-stuff your whole life, and just live a good clean healthy Paleo type lifestyle. There’s not really an end-all cure for all cancer, there’s only so much you can do, but living clean is the best way to prevent it.

Everything else – Ok I got lazy. Just follow Paleo. It fixes the world. Paleo fixes everything. Maybe even the government. Ok that’s a stretch, but Paleo is still pretty friggin awesome, right?

What has paleo cured for YOU?? Add to comments!

Wohoo!

~ Dan

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